i just dun seem to understand why people have to talk bad abt othrs while they themselves are not perfect... hmmmm.... i'm just wondering why... well.. for me is that if they really do wanna talk bad abt me.. pls do so... am ok wit it.. am just getting sick and tired of all this... well.. my life and decision is in my hand.. i will go thru it... i will definitely can make it... am sure abt it... i am very sure... rigth now am feeling kinda sad.. bored..unhappy.. and feels like a loser for today.. i just dunno why... hmmm.... all is because of alot of thinking is done.. tats the reason why... wel... diary.. for me... now.. i've found a new love ... and not coz of this new love i wanna called off the thing... its coz tat i can see that this new guy can really take good care of me... it seems like we've known each other for long... and the best thing is that he can read thru my mind and he can know wat i want and needs...well i'm lost for words.. i was actually very scared of him at first..thinking that is he someone that i've known before??
or is he an angel is disguise?? hmmm... but no matter wat it is.. i thank GOD for letting me to get to know him....i feel loved when i'm on by his side... i feels very comfortable...i love him so much diary... i can't really tell my feelings to others except for u diary...i do love him alot... i really do adore him and wanna take care of him for the rest of my life.... i love him so much diary...i love him.. i care for him.. i do wanna spend the rest of my life wit him.... i feel so special when am wit him.... hmmm... and i've promised him that no matter wat.. the 2 of us will go thru thick and thin together.. i dunno diary.. he is someone so special that i dun wanna let him go... it seems like i've known him for years like wat i said earlier...i pray to god that i will be wit him together till death do us apart...

mengapakah , kita sebagai insan kadang kala berasa
diri nya ini tidak berguna??
hidu di dunia ini sungguh hebat cabaran nya...
harus kah kita tempuhi semua cabaran ini dgn penuh kesabaran??
harus kah kita tempuhi nya dgn perlahan??
hisupku kini sebagai seorang yg tidak bermaya..
aku tahu... aku harus tempuhi semua itu...
tapi kadang kala , aku tidak kuat untuk menempungi cabaran ini...
ku tahu , ku harus menyelesai kan nya sedikit demi sedikit...
masalh yg ku hadapi ini bagi ku sunguh berat...
ku harus berfikir tentang masa depan ku ,masa depan keluargaku..
ku ingin mereka semua berasa gembira...
ku tak sanggup melihat mereka berdepan dgn masalah...
ku tidak sanggup melihat mama dan papa ku berasa gelisah..
biarlah aku seorang yg menanggung derita ini...
ku tahu aku tidak dpt memberi kemewahan..
tapi ku tahu ku dpt curah kan kasih sayangku terhadap mereka...
tentang hubungan ku bersam si dia...aku cuma serah kan pada yg maha esa..
ku tidak lagi ingin mengasihani diri org lain kalau diriku sendiri aku tidak kasihan..
buat masa sekarang ini... ku hanya kasihani diriku dan juga kedua papa dan mama ku..
ku tidak sanggup berlembut hati lagi semata-mata hendak menjaga hati nya...
sedangkan diriku ini tidak ada seorang pun yg kasihan...
biarlah apa orang hendak katakan tentang diriku ini...
ku sudah tidak ambil peduli lagi...
ku tahu diriku ini tidak bersalah..
di mata orang aku ini seolah-olah jahat...
biar kan lah....
ku sudah cukup dengan semua tomahan ini,....
ku pasrah...
skg ku hanya ingin tumpuhkan pada kerjaya dan keluarga ku..
dan aku ingin membuat papa dan mama ku bahagia selagi aku berdaya...